First Post & Thoughts...

I suppose when you have a blog, you would write a lot, pour your inner thoughts into right? Just like having an old fashion diary. But of course online. Well I guess all of you know what blogs are for, so I will stop here before i'm making an idiot out of myself haha.

But the thing is... I can never seemed to write good things in a blog.

to tell you the truth this is probably my third blog. And all the previous two were also desserted. But never mind that, I'll try to make this one a good one. And the one that i really, actually, fill with my writings. Because I really do love to write.

So anyway, things arent as good around me lately. I always felt as if I was being neglected. It happens that one day you would make a lot of friends and then as times goes by you become one of familiar faces in the hall. You're there, but you have no particular role. 

This often happens in high school.

And I am in high school. I'm on my way entering my last year of high school. I started my life in high school pretty fine. My group of friends was a bit seperated at first, each of us wanted to be different things. The popular, the smart ones, and I always just wanted to be there in the middle of everything. We were never at the top of the food chain  (if you know what I mean). But in the end we ended up together again. 

There were 8 of us. And were divided into 4 classes. 2 each. I wasnt too comfortable with my class, full of the popular kids who usually controls everything. But I was lucky enough to be stuk with all of the nice ones. I was never the one to share my opinion on anything. I was a shy one. I was a follower, not a leader. But somehow, that year, I got all the confindence I needed and everybody sees me as 'someone' and that felt good. I gained a lot of new friends. I got close with all the girls in my class. Which was a new thing for me because I spent my junior high stuck only with my group of friends. That 8 friends (plus two).

But as soon as I started my second year? All of those things I've gained? It was lost. I lost those new friends. I lost my confindence yet again. I was back on being a follower. And I miss those new friends that I've gained (but now lost). My original friends are fine. They're great. But sometimes not so understanding, maybe I will talk about that when I have te time... So I need a getaway, my new friends provided that. They used to.. not anymore. We used to share fun things... not anymore. 

I think it's very common to happen. But why? It sucks...